2010 June DudeFest Sekurity Report

by Buttons Nafziger on June 9, 2010 · 3 comments

in reports

A special #DudeFest Pawty was held June 5-7, 2010, in honor of the extraordinary @FrugalDougal.  Dougal personally picked the charities for DudeFest.  A total of $1,321 was raised for The Hounslow Animal Welfare Society and Kaninchenrettung.

Sergeant Brutus, the founder of DudeFest, was the officer in charge of the Sekurity Team for DudeFest.

Sekurity Team Roll Call

Official Sekurity Report

1:49 p.m. Sergeant Brutus officially checks in as Officer in Charge of DudeFest. @ShibberingC will kick things off.
3:03 p.m. @ShibberingC leave the stage.
3:12 p.m. Sergeant Brutus reports that Winston (@PushUpsnPaws) is covered with panties from the @ShibberingC concert. If you want yours back, donate to the DudeFest charities!
3:37 p.m. DJ @mattiedog plays a tribute song for Sekurity: “I said uh no!!!” I fight authority, & authority always winz!!! Dang sekurity!!! a tribute song 2 all U do 2 help us out!!
3:45 p.m. Sergeant Brutus reports: We’ve got a catfight going on at the bar between @jazzydacat, @mariodacat & @MaggieTKat!
3:53 p.m. Sergeant Brutus advises @jazzydacat that bribery will get her a trip to the slammer.
3:57 p.m. Report comes in that @ShibberingC paid bail for @missbusybiz. (Note: Dokumentation Officer can’t figure out if she was actually IN jail…or why…)
4:02 p.m. Officer Duchess reports for dooty.
Handoff Report: Other than a catfight at the bar, it’s been pretty quiet.
4:04 p.m. Sergeant Brutus signs off dooty. Officer Duchess is now in charge of sekurity.
4:20 p.m. Sekurity Alert: Block Bacon_FTW who is suspecked bot retweeter.
7:14 p.m. Officer Duchess switches to her mom’s account because of that darn Twitter jail!
7:54 p.m. Officer Duchess offers to stay on dooty through the empty shift. Mom’s account is in jail now, so she switches back to her own.
8:10 p.m. Officer Duchess advises @flicka47 that she’s watching, no stealing is allowed. (@flicka47 Just a bit. *sticking a bottle down each leg of my baggy pants for later*)
8:13 p.m. Officer Duchess reports: for the record it was ok for @flicka47 to take the bottles of hooch.
8:51 p.m. Officer Duchess reports: for the record, I was drinking the non-alcoholic Hank’s Bacon Root Beers.
9:21 p.m. Sekurity Alert: Block Bacon_FTW who is suspecked bot retweeter.
9:43 p.m. Sekurity Alert: Block Bacon_FTW who is suspecked bot retweeter. Also very annoying!
9:59 p.m. Sergeant Brutus reports for dooty to relieve Officer Duchess.
Handoff Report: All anipals been good & all is quite *bows head with report in paws* & hands Sekurity Report to Sergeant Brutus
10:21 p.m. Officer Duchess signs off. Sergeant Brutus is in charge of Sekurity.
10:32 p.m. Sekurity Alert: Cowpie fight at Dogmigo River. Look out! Incoming!
10:42 p.m. Sergeant Brutus reports that poo bribes are taking place! RT @PushUpsnPaws: If u don want to get hit by cowpies Winston suggests tipping at http://tinyurl.com/22vg5hf Whaack!
10:52 p.m. Sekurity Announcement: If you are covered in cowpie poo, there are showers down by the river. You can roll in the field.
11:27 p.m. @Fergusthedog questions whether or not Sergeant Brutus can strip while on dooty. Sergeant Brutus advises that stripping for charity was approved by Captain Snickers.
11:29 p.m. @MizzBassie adds in “With a physique like yours, stripping IS charity! Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrs”
12:00 a.m. Captain Snickers reports for dooty.
Handoff Report: There was some major cowpie throwing earlier but everyone showered off. We were stripping for cash but nobody wanted my hot bod tonight. @katieboocat is the barktender but is a bit tipsy! (Note: Dokumentation Officer was not present during Sergeant Brutus’ stripping, but really wishes she had been…)
12:10 a.m. Sergeant Brutus signs off dooty. Captain Snickers is in charge.
1:22 p.m. Officer Duchess signs into dooty to relieve Captain Snickers.
Handoff Report: It’s been quiet, although I could have missed something. I’m not feeling well.
1:25 a.m. Captain Snickers signing off sekurity duty early. Officer Duchess is covering and is now in charge of Sekurity
1:30 a.m. Officer Morris reports for dooty early and offers to relieve Officer Duchess. Officer Duchess will stay on for another half hour to finish Captain Snicker’s shift.
Handoff Report: All quiet…all aniplas being good!
2:59 a.m. Sekurity Alert from Officer Morris: Dudes and dudettes, there is a fartbot! Follow twittafart if you want farty tweets or block if you don’t!
3:00 a.m. Officer Morris does some floofilicious bar dancing for charity.
3:39 a.m. Sekurity Alert from Officer Duchess: OMD Block @Bacon_FTW who is suspecked bot retweeter. And very annoying!! AARRRooooo
4:00 a.m. Officer Duchess signs in for dooty.
Handoff Report: NOTHING AT ALL to report! At a #dudefest! I can’t believe it, anipals must be ill!
4:07 a.m. Officer Morris signs off dooty. Officer Duchess is in charge of sekurity.
4:09 a.m. Sekurity Announcement: No shoving at da bar – only 12 allowed on da bar at a time – Fire Code.
5:31 a.m. Sekurity Alert: Clear the way @Eddiebabycat iz a zoooooomie cat today. He’s zooooming everywhere!
5:52 a.m. Officer JB Hippo signs in for dooty.
Handoff Report: Anipals been good. All is quiet except for @Eddiebabycat zooming.
6:02 a.m. Officer Duchess signs off dooty. Officer JB Hippo is now in charge.
7:40 a.m. Sekurity alert! Spammer pharmacyrxone just tweeted at me!
8:01 a.m. Officer CheshireK reports for dooty.
Handoff Report: We were saddened to learn of the passing of @MedusaJ. Anipals respectful & quiet. @eddiebabycat was zoooooming around but not in a bad way.
8:09 a.m. Officer JB Hippo signs off dooty. Officer CheshireK now in charge.
9:54 a.m. Officer JB Hippo reports back for dooty.
Handoff Report: Very, very quiet. We’ve been celebrating Rosie, enjoying the noms, dancing on the bar. Nobody’s misbehaving at all.
10:05 a.m. Officer CheshireK signs off dooty. Officer JB Hippo back in charge.
11:49 a.m. Sekurity Alert: @tildatoo just blocked BenjaminBusby, think he’s spamming.
12:00 p.m. Sergeant Brutus reports in for dooty.
Handoff Report: It has been a very quiet shift. Nothing to report.
12:05 p.m. Officer JB Hippo signs off dooty. Sergeant Brutus back in charge.
12:53 p.m. Sekurity Alert: It’s almost time for another pawesome performance by @ShibberingC’s!
1:03 p.m. Officer JB Hippo and Officer Duchess work crowd control during the @ShibberingC concert. Lots of pushing, shoving, fainting groupies. Anipal panties and Cheetos dust are flying.
1:50 p.m. Toasts begin for @FrugalDougal, the guest of honor.
2:00 p.m. DudeFest officially ends.


snickers June 9, 2010 at 4:13 am

thanks again to officer duchess for filling in for me.

grate report buttons!

JB Hippo June 9, 2010 at 10:55 am

The part about the Poo Bribes made me giggle sooo much!

Great job, Buttons! 🙂

Pandafur June 9, 2010 at 1:02 pm

Grate sekurity report, I iz rilly sorry I missed Sgt Brutie’s stripteeeze!

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