2010 June PawPawty Sekurity Report

by JB Hippo on June 23, 2010 · 2 comments

in reports

The June Pawpawty, held the 19th – 20th, had a High Fashion theme and was attended by stunning models and amazing designers from around the world.

The pawpawty supported Good Mews, in Altanta, Georgia, USA. Over $1,000 was raised for the kittes there!

June 2010 Sekurity Team Roll Call

Captain Snickers

@Snick_the_dog

Sergeant Brutus

@brutusthedane

Officer Morris

@morriscat

Officer Duchess

@duchesscrabtree

Officer JB

@JBHippo

Cadet Benji

@Benjito95

Official Sekurity Report

2:00 PM Pawpawty begins! Captain Snickers  & Cadet Benji are on duty!
2:45 PM Cpt. Snickers tells Cadet Benji that the first pawpawty shift is always quiet & all anipals are normally on their best behavior.
3:06 PM Cpt. Snickers is stepping out for 20 minutes & leaving Sekurity duties in capable hands of Cadet Benji.
3:52 PM Cpt. Snickers explains the Handoff Report & ppsr hashtags to Cadet Benji.
HANDOFF REPORT pawpawty ran smoothly nothing out of the ordinary happened. Everything seemed under control.
4:01 PM Officer Duchess is on duty [for a loooooong time!].
4:54 PM Sekurity Alert: Watch out for the zoooooming @eddiebabycat! Guests are advised to duck or step aside.
5:01 PM Warning issued to @eddiebabycat – No knocking anipals off their feet!
5:23 PM Officer Duchess has landed in Twitter Jail & will be using her mama’s account.
5:25 PM Officer Duchess has escaped from Twitter Jail in record time!
6:02 PM Sekurity Alert: Anyone zoomin’ without respecting all the anipals (and not knocking them on their butts) will be arrested!
6:27 PM Officer Duchess announces that taxi rides are available for any anipal who may need a ride home.
8:07 PM Sekurity Alert: Block spammer @Bacon_FTW who is suspected retweet-bot and very annoying.
9:20 PM Sekurity is getting very annoyed with @Bacon_FTW and begs for him to be blocked (pleeeeeeeeez!!!)
10:46 PM Officer Duchess is exasperated by bacon spambot & warns that he NEVER GOES AWAY!
HANDOFF REPORT All anipals being good. BEWARE OF ZOOMING @eddiebabycat!
12:00 PM Cpt. Snickers is back on duty.
HANDOFF REPORT Sgt. Brutus gave a platter of chocolate bacon waffles [FTW!] to @DuchessCrabtree for covering FOUR shifts at this pawpawty! @marshallsheldon was streaking. I ran him up a tree & he put his pants back on.
2:00 AM Cpt. Snickers is off duty. Officer Morris is now on Sekurity detail.
NONHANDOFF REPORT Warned the models in high heels to look out for zooooming kitties in case they get knocked over. @perrythebirman was involved in unkown shenanigans behind his Birmin  Wall. @perrythebirman confirmed that he planned to blame me for trouble, since we’re identical twins!
4:00 AM Officer Morris now off duty. No Sekurity for next two hours. [shudder]
5:58 AM Officer JB signs in.
7:43 AM @kingtuttifruiti & @thenascarkitty are told of Officer JB’s new Sekurity Slogan, “Just say no! – to furless streaking!”
7:45 AM SEKURITY ANNOUNCEMENT: Furless nekkid streaking will not be tolerated! Nekkid is ok, but must keep fur ON! There are kittens present! Thank you!
7:46 AM Sekurity has eye on @thenascarkitty, @fluffythekat, & @kingtuttifruiti under suspicion of a plot to engage in furless streaking.
7:57 AM Anipals are advised to block suspected spambot “jacklohan”.
8:14 AM Officer JB tries to get the point across through rhyme: Streaking is fine, nekkid streaking is great, furless streaking I’ll terminate!
9:07 AM @ShibberingC warns Sekurity to watch out for a couple of wild groupies called @hookalopes. They wear 7″ acrylic platform shoos!
10:01 AM Sgt. Brutus checks in for duty. Officer JB is now off duty.
HANDOFF REPORT It’s been quiet! There was talk of furless streaking – they zoomed off w/o incident.
10:05 AM Sgt. Brutus asks Officer JB about the @hookalopes as their reputation preceeds them.
10:18 AM @hookalopes have been told to be careful. They must continue to be on their best behavior.
10:54 AM Are the @hookalopes propositioning @CosmoHavanese?!
11:15 AM Sgt. Brutus & Officer Duchess discuss their plan to deal with the @hookalopes during the @ShibberingC performance.
11:40 AM SEKURITY ALERT: @ShibberingC bus will be arriving shortly!
11:47 AM Gates for @ShibberingC are open! Anipals must for orderly lines. Special show in 15 minutes!
11:52 AM Panties are already littering the stage and the @ShibberingC bus hasn’t even arrived yet!
12:26 PM @hookalopes are pulled off stage and handcuffed! Off to the slammer, ladies!
12:27 PM Paparazzi are pushed back into area provided for them.
12:28 PM Sekurity Announcement: Anyone want to post bail for the @hookalopes?
12:37 PM Ammended Sekurity Announcement: $10 will keep the @hookalopes IN jail, $20 will bail them out!
12:44 PM @Georgetheduck has posted bail for the @hookalopes.
1:00 PM Sekurity Announcement: @ShibberingC are leaving the stage! Make way!
1:02 PM Officer Duchess holds those @hookalopes back as @ShibberingC leaves the stage.
1:06 PM @hookalopes are prevented from entering the @ShibberingC tour bus.
2:00 PM High Fashion Pawpawty officially ends!

{ 2 comments }

snickers June 23, 2010 at 7:07 pm

this a very good report espeshully for your first time on dokumentashun duties officer JB! thank you for doing it! i haz to remember to watch out for @hookalopes at the next pawty.

JB Hippo June 23, 2010 at 11:08 pm

Thank you so much, Captain! I had fun doing it! 🙂

Yes, those @hookalopes can get a bit wild! They are good natured ladies, just a little, um … Too Exuberant! They realllllly love those @ShibberingC musicians! 🙂

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